Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I will pee on everything he values.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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