Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
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