3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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