On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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