Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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