Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
