no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I take back everything I said about communal showers
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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