I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
