Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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