i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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