she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
