This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
foreskin is a definite game changer
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
