either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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