So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Randomize
