The maid of honor just puked.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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