ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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