I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
