i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
