So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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