I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
