u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
