alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
