Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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