The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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