I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
