you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
