He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
