oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
