I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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