it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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