i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
