last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
