They should really pass out barf bags in church
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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