why didn't you poke me back
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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