thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
