you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
