Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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