then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
