Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
