I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
