Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize