Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
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