Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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