I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
this is an emotional support booty call
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