Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
