I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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