paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
