I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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