PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
