My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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