It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
